Wednesday, November 3, 2010

NaNo Treat!

Title: On A Dark Night
Word Count: 1,346
Genre: Realistic Fiction

It's National Novel Writing Month, and I'm attempting to write a novel, again. It's the story of a college aged girl who unwittingly witnesses a kidnapping. She discovers she has some interesting abilities, which leads her to track down the kidnapper and save the young girl. It's tentatively called Hidden Souls.

Part of my preparation for this was to try to do character sketches for my two main characters. However, I only managed to write a little bit of my female main character's sketch. I got ahead on my novel again tonight, though, so I decided to sit down and finish writing that (I dedicated three hours to writing, and finished well above my word count in about 1 1/2).

So, I'm offering it here. It's the very first draft, so keep that in mind when reading it, but it might give you some insight into Ms. Sophia Carson. Let me know what you think!


On A Dark Night

“Something doesn't feel right about this, Maggie,” Sophia complained as she squirmed in the leather seat. “Are you sure you're allowed to be out like this?”

“Chill out Soph. Daddy doesn't care what I do so long as I don't interrupt his precious poker game,” Maggie muttered, rolling her eyes and snapping her gum obnoxiously.

“Still... it's kinda late to be out, and you just got your license, and it looks like rain...” Sophia bit her lip to stop the stream of words from her mouth.

“No worries. I've had plenty of practice.” Maggie smiled as she put the sports car into gear and slowly pulled out of the driveway.

Sophia pulled at her seat belt to make sure it was secured and looked around her anxiously. It seemed as if there were eyes in the shadows watching her, waiting until just the right moment to spring out and raise the alarm.

She shook her head. The stress of finals must be getting to her. Nothing was going to happen, just like Maggie had said.

Tend minutes later, they were on the mountain, turning around the corners with the top down and the cool air running through their hair.

“This is so awesome!” Maggie shouted, bringing the car around another corner. “Aren't you glad I talked you into this?”

“Yes! This is just what I needed after a day like today!” Sophia exclaimed, throwing her hands up. A few minutes later, they pulled into a pull out overlooking the city.

Sophia smiled as she gazed at the glittering lights below. “It's so beautiful up here. And so quiet.”

Maggie nodded and leaned back in her seat. “I know. I come up with the best ideas ever. I'm sure you'll find some way to repay me.”

Sophia laughed softly and nudged her friend. “Maybe I'll make you a cheesecake or something.”

“Mmm... cheesecake. Make it with Oreos and you've got a deal.”

“Oreos it is,” Sophia confirmed. Leaning her head back and closing her eyes, she paused, taking in the scents and sounds around her. A drop splashed on her eyelid and she blinked slowly. Rain was beginning to fall steadily around them. “Guess that means we should head back,” she muttered.

“Spoilsport,” Maggie replied, turning the key in the ignition and putting up the top.

“Well, I certainly wouldn't want to drive down the mountain in a torrential downpour...”

“Yeah, yeah. I'm going...” Maggie backed out onto the road far more smoothly than might be expected from a newly licensed 16 year old, then put the car into gear and started the descent down the mountain. She wisely took the curves much more slowly, especially as the rain started coming down in sheets.

The windshield wipers were swiping at full blast and still Maggie squinted over the dashboard to see the road ahead of them. The sky was a dull gray, and the lights of the city below provided little illumination. The headlights of the car only extended a few feet in front of them, so they had slowed to a crawl to avoid missing a turn.

“I told you this was a bad idea,” Sophia muttered, sitting on the edge of her seat.

“Shut up and keep an eye out for me. You can yell at me all you want once we're safe,” Maggie snapped, her knuckles white against the steering wheel.

“Someone's coming this way,” Sophia said, pointing to a light on the road ahead of them. “Maybe you should pull off til they pass.” She glanced at the small stretch of dirt to her right.

Maggie's eyes darted to the shoulder, then back to the road. “It's too muddy. If I pull off now, we'll be stuck til morning.”

Sophia bit her lip, but nodded slowly She kept her eyes fixed on the road ahead of them, watching the progress of the other car. A few minutes later, they passed without incidence, and she let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. Shaking her head, she turned back to the road and sat on the edge of her seat as they slowly coasted down the mountain.

Ahead, at the bottom of the stretch of road, a stoplight changed from red to green, and Maggie responded by letting off the brake a little more. The car sped up, moving closer and closer to the stoplight as it flicked to yellow, then back to red. She reacted quickly, smashing her foot against the brake, but quickly lost control of the car. The back wheels fishtailed back and forth across the road as she turned the steering wheel violently in an attempt to get a better control of the car.

Sophia tried to focus on the road ahead of them, and saw a white pair of lights coming to the intersection. She tensed, gripping the armrests and sending up a silent prayer that they would be able to stop. The car refused to slow as it got closer, though, and she pressed her eyes closed tightly. She heard a horn blaring to her right, but refused to open her eyes, muttering prayers to herself. A flash of light crossed her face and she heard the squeal of tires, followed by a loud crash and a jolt of the car beneath her.

“We're okay,” Maggie sighed, her hands still fastened to the wheel.

Sophia slowly opened her eyes, then patted herself down, clearly unsure of whether or not to believe her words friends. As her senses caught up with her thoughts, she started looking around frantically. They had come to a stop on the sidewalk on the opposite side of the stoplight. The jolt she felt was the car bouncing up over the curb.

Maggie was still gripping the steering wheel, as if she were physically unable to let go. Sophia opened her door and stepped out into the rain, trying to assess the car for damage. She couldn't see any, and wondered what the crash that she heard was. She scanned the street, and saw the source of the crash. The car that had been about to hit them had slammed into the pole holding up the streetlight, its hood crunched badly and steam coming out of the now dead engine.

“Oh my god... Maggie. There's been an accident. We've got to help them!” Sophia said frantically, looking through the window at her friend.

The words seemed to snap Maggie out of whatever trance she was in, and she looked at Sophia, then turned and looked at the accident. Biting her lip, she turned back to Sophia. “Get in,” she said in a deadly calm voice.

“What? No... we've got to see if they're alright!” Sophia shouted, gesturing wildly towards the car.

“No... we've got to get home. We can call 911 on the way and tell them we passed an accident. The ambulance will come and take care of them,” Maggie said, the dead calm still present in her voice.

“What are you talking about? They could be hurt! We've got to help!” Sophia argued, her voice breaking slightly.

“No, we've got to get to safety. We can't help them. We will call someone who can. Get in.” When Sophia didn't move, Maggie added, “I'll leave you here and you can explain how we caused the accident. I don't think your dad would appreciate that, Soph.”

Sophia bit her lip, but slowly slipped back into the car, tears springing to her eyes. Maggie pulled out her phone and tossed it into Sophia's lap, then pulled the car off the sidewalk and back onto the road home.

Sophia's fingers were numb as she dialed. “Nine-one-one. What is your emergency?”

Sophia took a deep breath. “There was a car accident on the corner of Jefferson and Holly. It looked pretty bad. You should get someone out there right away.” Without waiting for the operator to respond, Sophia clicked the phone shut and set it in the center console. She remained silent for the ride back to her house, barely acknowledging the goodbye Maggie gave her.

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